I've been hanging out on PAL a lot lately. Sometimes posting, sometimes just lurking. There were a number of us TTC again and so I felt a bit more at home there than I have in a while. Well, there was, and is still going on, a huge BFP wave. Now, of corse I'm happy for everyone. I'm always happy for any AL mom who gets pg again. But... I'm not a part of that wave and it makes me sad. It's like TTCAL all over again, every month feeling more and more left behind. No joke, I'm pretty sure there are only two of us on PAL left who are actively TTC.
I know it hasn't been that long this time around. This is only our third cycle trying, and believe me, I know that's not long at all. But silly me, I just thought that it might be easier this time. I thought maybe I wouldn't have to go through the years of trying and hoping and being disappointed month after month. I thought maybe I'd get to be one of the lucky ones. I know I won't be getting pregnant this month. Or next month. Or the month after that. I know it's going to take me a while to get pg and stay pg again. My LPs are back to their old 7 days again, and I'm really going to need another miracle or some medical intervention to get baby #2. I know I have a long road ahead of me...
The long and winding road
That leads to your door
Will never disappear.
I've seen that road before.
It always leads me here
Lead me to your door.
I'm just feeling pretty down.
Lots of Love,
KJsbabe
I'm so sorry. I lurk more than post on PAL now, but the BFP streak definitely stings. I was part of it and then lost the baby. I wish the second time around could be easier. I'm praying you're surprised with a healthy pregnancy more quickly than you expect!
ReplyDeleteMissa, you are so sweet. Thank you for your kind words. Let me say again how sorry I am for your loss. I was praying so hard for you and your LO. Life just isn't fair :(
ReplyDeleteI have just recently started tracking my cycles again because we are going to start TTC as well! It may be a few months before I bust out the OPKs, may try it naturally for a while, I still don't know... BUT, I wanted to say I've got my FX for you! I have been lurking on PAL, but I haven't posted in SO long. I doubt anyone would remember me, lol. I'm glad to know you're back though. I wasn't really sure what board to get back on to intro again. I can't handle the general TTC board.
ReplyDeleteBrooke, yay for TTC again! How exciting! There's a pretty wide range to ladies on PAL, oldies and newbies. Those TTGP ladies are cray-cray! I lurk there sometimes for the drama haha! I think they would eat me alive. I will be keeping my FX for you, too!
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